大学情景剧剧本

01
  车站  有几个小偷趁人群拥挤而偷钱包,正巧让一位正在执勤的警察见到。

  警察: 站住,站住(抓住小偷)在这么多人的面前居然敢偷东西

  小偷: 这么多人,怎偏偏是追我

  警察: 我打不过其他的,而且你也跑得慢

  小偷: 阿SIR,饶了我吧,我这次没偷到东西,等下次偷到了再抓啊

  警察: 少废话,走,回差馆去

  小偷: 先吃点东西再走,我几天没吃东西了

  警察: 还想吃东西,为了抓你们我可几天没得休息

  小偷: 就饶我一次,最多下次偷到我分点给你

  警察: 少罗嗦,给我闭上嘴

  小偷: 分一半给你,要不你七我三,怎样?

  警察: 少来这招,我们警察不会徇私枉法,贪收钱财,走.回差馆去

  (差馆)

  警察: 坐下,老实回答我的问题,姓名

  小偷: 黄小偷

  警察: 真实姓名

  小偷: 黄偷偷

  警察: 性别

  小偷: 你没长眼,连我是男是女都分不清

  警察:  (打)我问你呢

  小偷: 你怎随便打人,有没王法的

  警察:  (打)在这里我就是王法.我高兴想打就打.不开心就打来出气

  你奈何得了我啊

  小偷: 别打了,我这身材受不住

  警察: 你这排骨头也顶不了我一拳,不想受苦就老实回答问题

  小偷: 我怎么做小偷呢,小偷的命真苦的,早知我就不做小偷了

  警察: 后悔了吧

  小偷: 还不如拦路抢劫,抓到就死,免受皮肉之苦

  警察: 少废话,年龄

  小偷:  20

  警察: 学历

  小偷: 本科

  警察:  (拍台)想死啊,给我老实点

  小偷:  (递卡)是本科的,现在正在实训,你看,这是校卡

  警察: 这是哪间大学

  小偷: 原名叫小偷职业技术学院.现在改名为偷盗大学,我读的是小偷专业

  警察: 还是职业小偷,怪不得我们警队几十人在公交车上潜伏了几天都抓不到一个

  小偷: 过奖过奖

  警察: 你老大是谁

  小偷: 不知道

  警察: 口硬不说吧

  小偷: 不知道,姓不,叫知道,开会他是这样说的

  警察: 小偷还开会

  小偷: 一年一次的迎新大会,我们这行的除了本分工作,还负责介绍新生入学,每介绍一个人,上头就给我们颁发奖章,满十个人就能升级做主管

整理:zjh201604

大学情景剧剧本旁白

02
  旁白:9月,我们来到了大学开始了我们崭新的生活,就这样我们也迎来了大学的第一课——军训。在这个过程中我们可以学到很多东西,纪律,坚持,或者某种精神。于是,我们开始了大学旅行的第一站。同学们,请注意,军训开始了!

  场面:教官与辅导员一起出场,四连的同学已经乱成一团。

  辅导员:范教官这就是我们班的女生了,后面的十五天就辛苦你啦!

  教官:老师您客气了!请放心我一定完成任务!

  辅导员:同学们请安静!这位是范教官,军训这几天就由范教官带领大家共同完成任务希望大家好好配合范教官,那老师就先走了。

  场面:辅导员刚走出不远同学又开始乱成一团

  教官:安静!安静!看看你们!一套军装都能让你们穿出这么多花样来!还在这里嬉皮笑脸的!(走到刘好面前停下)看看这位同学就穿得很标准了!现在,所有人都有了以这位同学为标准3分钟,整理好你们的着装!开始!

  教官:(走到张杰面前很诧异的问)你的军帽呢?

  张杰:因为我不喜欢带绿帽子啊!

  教官:首先,记住了以后跟教官讲话要先打报告!其次,为什么别人都能戴就你不可以?

  张杰:报告教官,这纯属个人爱好与他人无关!

  教官:那好!等会儿别人休息时你一个人进行军姿训练啊?

  张杰:(一脸哀怨)凭啥子呀?

  教官:这纯属个人爱好与他人无关!(大家都笑开了)笑什么笑!都严肃点!稍息!立正!(走到许娇娇面前)这位同学,你的裤子怎么穿得古里古怪的?

  许娇娇:报告教官,这你就不懂了!这就是时尚!

  教官:30秒,赶快纠正!(许一脸的不情愿嘟囔着开始整理)

  教官(走到张林希身后饶有兴趣的打量她)你的军鞋呢?

  张林希:报告教官,军鞋太丑我看不下去丢了!

  教官:脸难看了是不是也要丢了?哪儿丢的哪儿减回来!(众人大笑)

  张林希:报告教官!脸难看不是可以整容的嘛!(众人又笑)

  教官:那么我建议你也去整整容啊!(说完尴尬的转身挪挪,众人又一次大笑)不要笑!都严肃点啊!好现在开始点名!刘德。。。。刘德华!(惊讶)

  刘德华:有!!

  教官:天王啊!好下一个 许娇娇

  许娇娇:到!   报告教官,我可不可以不穿裤子呢?

  教官:啊??(大吃一惊)

  许娇娇:教官,我可不可以不穿这条裤子呢?

  教官:给我严肃点啊!我可不是你爸啊!

  许娇娇:我爸是许刚!!

整理:zjh201604

大学英语情景剧剧本

03
  Ci:Our boss must be enjoying his holiday in Fiji very much.What do you think he will feel when he comes back to see our case?

  Ca:Of course he will feel surprised and give each of us a promotion.

  Wing:Come on,he is a devil,how could he do this to us?Anyway,we should award ourselves for these days hard work!

  Ca:You are right.Let’s pig out on junk food!

  Wing:I have stayed in China for a whole year and I miss my hometown.I miss German food!

  Ca:so do I .how much I love French food!

  Ci:I have not eaten German or French food before.Do you have any recommendation?

  Ca:If you visit France or go to a French restaurant,snails,cheese,and goose liver and red wine are the best choices.

  Wing:You also can’t miss the famous German sausage,ham and blue checse

  Ci:They all sound yummy.But do you know what Chinese eat when they miss their families?

  Wing&Ca:No

  Ci:The answer is dumplings!

  Ca:Well ,I heard that before though I haven’t tasted .

  Wing:Can you make dumplings,CiCi?Would you make some for us?I have been longing for dumplings for a long time.

  Ci:Aha,it is as easy as a pie for me .what about coming to my house tonight?We can make dumplings together.I will teach you how to cook it.

  Ca:Great!That is fantastic.Then it will be the first time to make and eat dumplings

  Wing:Very good idea!We could busy some basic ingredient at the supper market after work.

  Ci:Sure.We need flour,yeast,pork,cabbages,vinegar,sauce and ginger.

  (The three colleagues had their shopping and now they are in CiCi’s house)

  CiCiours some pour on the table and said:”Carrie,can you fetch some water here?”

  Ca:sure,here you are .what s next?

  Ci:Ci:we have to mix the flour yeast and water together .be careful ,don’t add too much water.

  Ca:Okay,I’m kneeing the dough repentedly.it is becoming and softer

  Wing:Yeah,I am cutting the pork into many small pieces,and then I will add several spoons of oil in it .shall I blend them?

  CiCi:Yes,make sure they blend well.A bit salt and a spoon of vinegar are needed,too.

  (an hour later)

  Ca:Yes,the dumplings are prepared .lets start!

  CiCi:Wait!I remember well that you all miss the food from your hometown.Look,what are these?

  Ca:Wow!Cheese!Where did you get it?And my favorite red wine.

  Wing:God.Those are sausage and ham,I can’t believe it!

  CiCi:Haha,it is a big surprise,isn’t it?Now ,we are got all three countries’ food ready.

  Ca:So it is a complete big meal.

  Wing:An unforgettable banquet in my life.Let’s cheers!

  Ca,Ci,Wing:Cheers!

整理:zjh201604